Super excited finally created my first and only logo!!

I'm not sure what I'm going to need a logo or a slogan for, but I've got both, and I couldn't be happier 😀 Feel free to comment and let me know what you think...

 

      Hi everyone! As it gets closer to Christmas and emotions are coming to the surface for many of us, I wanted to talk a little bit about anxiety. I suffer from anxiety and am currently off my meds due to issues with finding a new provider, so it's really hitting me hard. I want to share some of my thoughts and feelings today in hopes that anyone who reads this. 

    I have 2 young daughters, so my house is trashed, but every time I get up to start cleaning, I get overwhelmed and sit back down. I have not been able to get off the couch or out of bed for about 3 days now. I mentioned in my introduction that I fought DHS for 3 years to get my daughters back, and this is the first Christmas I've had them and I had to call their Dad to pick them up early (he was supposed to come the 26th) because my anxiety got the best of me. I am struggling internally because this is my first chance to spend Christmas with my daughters, and I had to tap out.

    I've gone back and forth all day about this, and I am still having mixed emotions, but at the end of the day, I have to stand by my decision because I know it is the best thing not only for myself but for my daughters as well. They deserve the best version of me possible, and I am incapable of giving that to them. I am yelling at them for small things, ignoring the big things, I'm pretty much immobilized, and I've been crying intermittently throughout the day. They don't understand any of this; they just know that mommy is different, and at a time in our lives where consistency and stability are so important, keeping them with me when I have an alternative would set us back. 

As you can see, I am comfortable talking about my mental health issues, but I know not everyone is. I want to normalize talking about your mental health issues, whatever they may be. I also want people to stop beating themselves up for how they feel at any given time. I know it's hard because I spent most of the day kicking my ass. Feelings and emotions set us apart from animals; they remind us that we are alive and beautifully flawed and human. So, before you get stuck in these emotions and let them take you to a negative place, remember it doesn't have to get to that point. Reach out to friends, family, and loved ones, take a walk or a drive, read a book, watch a movie, listen to music that touches your soul, anything that keeps you present yet able to feel and process your emotions.

Keep in Keepin' On, 

Hot Mess Momma

Hot Mess Momma Let's Get to Know Each Other

     Hi, I'm Gillian, aka the "Hot Mess Momma." I am new to blogging, and I ask you to bear with me and be kind. I'm open to suggestions and advice if you have any, but please be kind. Let me tell you a little about myself and my hopes for this blog. 

    I am a 43-year-old single mother of 5 and 6-year-old girls. I also have two adult children, ages 24 and 28, and 3 granddaughters. I am currently a full-time student and a Direct Care Provider for intellectually disabled adults. I am also funny, obnoxious (at times), cuss like a sailor, and have a questionable sense of humor; I am outspoken, opinionated, and suffer from ADHD and Anxiety. I am also kind, compassionate, interested in people, and willing to share my stories in hopes that they will help someone or make them feel less alone. I have done several years/terms in prison, been in abusive and toxic relationships for as long as I can remember, I have a son that is part of the LGBTQ+ community, and I just got my girls back from the state after a 3-year battle. Most recently, I finished my first semester of college after being out of school for nearly 30 years. 

    Now tell me about yourself, anything you want me to know, questions you'd like to ask me, topics you'd like me to discuss. Anything at all. Eventualy, I would like to have a "Dear Hot Mess" advice column so maybe you could share your thoughts on that as well. I hope to get to know my readers (assuming I get some) well and share this journey together. 

Bye for Now, 

Hot Mess Momma

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