We Do Recover...

    Hey, ya'll! I wanted to talk about addiction and recovery today. These are both things I have LOTS of firsthand knowledge about. I am not necessarily proud of that, but I am not ashamed, either. I was talking to a friend the other day about addiction, what it's like in early recovery, and why I believe it is so hard for people to take that first step and stay clean and sober. I can only speak for myself, but it was like when you finally decided to leave a toxic relationship. With getting sober, we struggle because all we can remember are the good parts. Like how good it makes you feel. You go into a depression because all you can think of is that drug/alcohol and all the times it helped you to "feel better", took away your pain, and was always with you when no one else was there. Leaving drugs to make a better life for yourself is scary and in doing so you go through a type of mourning the same way you do when you leave a bad relationship. Also like a bad relationship, you may go back a few times out of habit, loneliness, or a need for the familiar. Still, eventually, you realize it's not worth the pain and fuckery and you are able to walk away for good.

    We forget how it robbed us of so many things; our friends, jobs, homes, our sense of self, our dignity, our belongings or our loved one's belongings, the trust others had in us, our pride our morals, and last but not least the most precious of all time. Time away from our families, time spent trying to get the drug, time spent being unhealthy and unable to present in moments that mattered with people we love. We can never get this time back, but we can, if we take that first step toward recovery, make the best of the time that we do have. 

I kind of got lost in the writing of this post it took me a week longer than I intended to write it due to some personal issues, being ill, and trying to figure out if this blog is something i can or should do but it's done. Hope you like it and that it helps someone please reach out to me if you want to discuss this further, if you need clarification or if you just want to shoot the shit.

Sending Love and Positive Energy, 

Hot Mess Momma